Crikey, what a life

Last night, the Discovery Channel showed the last documentary that Steve Irwin, the Crocodile Hunter, filmed. They also showed several episodes of the TV show. It was a very moving night of television. Steve lived his life with such joy and enthusiasm. They showed one episode where he went to Antarctica and he was able to swim with penguins and then humpback whales. He was so enthusiastic, you almost forget he was floating on an iceberg. He tried sliding down the hill like the penguin. He talked about the circle of life, how the bigger animals eat the little ones, but the little ones are able to get some protection. A elephant seal tried to chase him, and he laughingly told it "I'm a land mammal, you are not going to catch me." after calling it naughty and gorgeous.

I so admire his enthusiasm for life. He found something to be passionate about in everything. Even when he was talking about a whaling plant as a shame of history, he was excited that the volcano was reclaiming the land.

I hugged Vince and Sydney tighter last night. There are no guarantees. Princess Diana died in a car accident. Ronald Regan got Alzheimer's. Eva Peron had ovarian cancer. Steve was killed by a sting ray, in an atmosphere much safer than a lot of things he did in his life, like chase snakes. Life is fragile. The man who held cobras and green mambas in his hand, wrestled with the largest crocs on the planet, and narrated for us at home the whole time was killed while swimming with an animal known for being peaceful and safe.

He seemed to be someone who feel in head first. He loved with all his heart. He loved his family. He loved his animals. He loved life.

One episode they showed was first shown in 2004, called Confessions of the Crocodile Hunter. It had very candid interviews with Steve, Terri, and other family members. It talked about his pain at the death of his mom. Steve talked about Teri nursing baby Bob. They went into the truth behind the "baby Bob incident." It showed clips of Terri giving birth to baby Bob. While they were wheeling her into the hospital, the narrator said something like "after several strict conception procedures" about the pregnancy. Makes me wonder.... Did the Irwin's deal with infertility? Bindi was born in 1998, baby Bob 2003. It makes me sad when I hear of anyone having infertility problems, as I know the pain. I tried googling and found nothing. I hope they did not have this trial, but I'd bet good money they did. How sad for them, and for everyone else who deals with this burden.

This adds a layer of substance, depth, and humanity to Steve and Teri.

Rest in Peace Steve, the world is a better place because you were here. Thank you for showing me the good side of crocs and snakes. I will try to find my passion and live every day to the fullest.

Teri, Bindi, Bob, baby Bob, and Wes my deepest condolences on the loss of someone you love so much. It must be very hard to lose someone with as much presence as Steve. I miss him and I never met him. I cannot imagine your pain.

BFN

I was over playing games last night at the home of two dear friends. While there, the one trying to get pregnant took a pregnancy test and it came back a BFN.

I just hate infertility. It just sucks.

You know who you are, but I am so very sorry about your BFN. I had my fingers crossed for your family to add the new family member you desire.

I've been there. I had a way to long cycle, and I was sure I was pregnant. No, my hormones were so screwed up that I had not had a period for 3 months. I had to take medicine to start my period.

I hate peeing on a stick. Until Sydney, that stick had never even given me any glimmer that I was pregnant. No faint line, no maybe, no hint of hope.

That is what you have to have to survive infertility. Hope. Courage. Love.

Hang onto your hope. There were times that this seemed hopeless for us, but there always is something to hope for.

It is a tremendous act of courage to TTC again after a BFN. You want something so simple, but it is so very hard.

Hang onto the love of your spouse. Your spouse hurts as you do. Don't let infertility drive a wedge between you. You will need each others love to get through the hard times.

I hope I'm not coming off preachy, that is not my desire. I just wanted to share a bit of what I learned through our infertility journey.