I'll kiss it.

This morning, I was snuggled safe in my bed. My baby was sleeping next to me. I turned to my side and turned on the Today show, as is my usual morning routine. As Sydney is well known to do, she rolled over to have her back touching mine. If there is a person or cat in the bed, she moves in her sleep to cuddle. This can make the bed a bit cramped at times, but it is cute.

I laid there, warm and snuggled next to my baby, watching the horror from Virginia Tech. I don't understand how God allows this. They were just going to French class, damn it. I worried for Vince, sitting in his math class. I worry for Sydney sitting in her first grade class someday. I worry for my sister in high school. I worry for my sister singing in the choir. I worry for my brother teaching junior high students Utah history.

I'm angry that, once again, we see images of horror and death coming from our television screens. I'm very angry at the shooter. He chained them in. He left them, let them think they were safe, and came back to shoot them some more.

No where is safe. I think of all the horrors which have come through my television set.... maybe I don't want TV anymore. Maybe I don't want the Internet anymore. Maybe I want to just live on a tiny island far far away.

While watching, this interview came on. I laid there snuggling my baby and watched a father show his pain. Stone Phillips is interviewing Joe Samaha, whose daughter Reema was killed in her French class. I heard the profound grief of this father, and cried for him and his daughter.

These words will haunt me, they so eloquently illustrate the depth of his grief. I am so thankful that all I love are safe, and I ache for those who are grieving right now.

Phillips: What questions remain in your mind?
Joe Samaha: Why didn’t she skip class? Why was she there at that time? Why was the shooter doing? What he was doing? Why was he on a rampage?
Phillips: Is there anything more you want to say.
Joe Samaha: I just want to see our daughter. We’re having a tough time doing that. The medical examiner’s office doesn’t have the facilities to reunite the families with their deceased. They said they could provide us with photographs in a few hours.
Phillips: You need to see something, you need to see her face.
Joe Samaha: Absolutely. I need to see her face.
Phillips: And when you do see it?
Joe Samaha: I’ll kiss it.